Advice Please for An Artist's Anxiety

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In my sketchbook I feel free to make images. My sketches here flow from my hand without thought.


 Why is it so very difficult for me to feel like that when faced with a canvas?!

You might remember these I started last week...

A good start but I personally didn't like them because each part of them hadn't flowed when I was painting. It was as though I had a stern voice over my shoulder telling me to "get it right" with every brushstroke. How intimidating!


This is the one that you saw in the right hand side of the photo. I do love the colours but I felt I was trying too hard with the composition and that was preventing me from enjoying the process. If you're a painter you'll know how badly a painting will turn out if you haven't enjoyed at least part of the making!
So I decided to pretend I was painting in my sketchbook, with no-one to please except myself, and this is what happened to it...




I loved creating all those patterns and the bright pink was a joy to work with.

So the moral of my story? 
I'm still a bit spaced out from finishing this and I have it hanging on my wall so that I can live with it for a bit before I make up my mind about it.
I'd love to know what you think and for any advice on how to please myself and to make that voice shut up!
Thankyou lovely people! xx



Comments

Sarah said…
I befriended my Inner Critic ( the voice you talk about) it is part of you, and anytime you try to suppress or silence or part of yourself you reduce your intelligence. So get to know it, talk to it, teach it how to help you, it actually wants to protect you from shame, that's it's function, but it has poor communication skills - teach it new ones. Mine works well with me now, and helps me with my work.
26 September 2014 at 12:06
Silke Powers said…
Yes, what Sarah said! And I think that's why I work so much in ways that are unpredictable, so I don't get into that space of thinking I'm doing it "wrong." Your final painting is gorgeous!! Truly - those color! Well, you know how I feel about color... :) xoxo Silke
26 September 2014 at 14:47
Paper rainbow said…
Oh Jess how familiar your words are. I too have the voice telling me to consider composition. Tonal value and complimentary colours and yes it can be stifling you seem to have quietned your voice and created a fabulous piece. How different and wonderful your little horse is. X
26 September 2014 at 18:52
lynne h said…
jess, i think pretending is good... : ) i adore the pink horse! and your sketchbook pages...

xoxo
26 September 2014 at 19:52
Merlesworld said…
They are fun and colourful and are happy to look at.
Merle..............
26 September 2014 at 23:16
CJ said…
A transformation! You have found what it wanted to be, and it's lovely. I don't know how to make it happen, but you're right, things do need to flow I think. Wishing you good creative energy. CJ xx
27 September 2014 at 10:26
Tammie Lee said…
your art is a joy to see
playful and colorful
i think you have stumbled on great advice, always paint for yourself.
27 September 2014 at 16:53
Martina said…
It's beautiful Jess! And it teransports just what you have told - the joy of spontaneity and creativity in flow, gallopping into the painting! Happy sunday!
27 September 2014 at 20:14
Ces Adorio said…
You haven't changed. You are colorful now as you were then. I stumbled here tonight following a comment I was reading on an old post in 2010. Oh my. These paintings are exquisite!
28 September 2014 at 04:08
Dear Fireflies said…
Dearest Jessie. I think it is in an artist's nature to never feel content with our work. There's always the urge to change, adjust and make things as "perfect" as we it in our mind. We are our toughest critics and sometimes that gets in the way of creating. I still and probably will continue to face similar problems as yours, but I think the best thing to do is just to create as if you are your only spectator. :)
28 September 2014 at 10:43
Kyra Wilson said…
Honestly, the only way I can get the voice to shut up is to tell myself "It's ok if it doesn't turn out. What have you really lost?" I also have started to make peace that not every piece we finish will be a masterpiece. In fact, it's usually the unexpected ones that hit the loudest note with others. So, find your joy, keep chasing it, and move on to the next painting without regret.
29 September 2014 at 14:02
rossichka said…
Hello, Jessie! I can't give you an advice, but I suppose that you have found the answer. And that is - to paint without bothering about "what would happen if" or "Am I on the right way?" First of all YOU should be pleased with the result. And just then comes the audience... I like the vibrant, bright colours that flow from your new works! Good luck with the upcoming ones!:)
30 September 2014 at 19:23
denthe said…
This is such a happy, joyful painting. I love the bright colours. Last year I did a workshop with Orli Avineri, and she said you need to learn to paint like a child again. Not think, just play and enjoy the process, because when you start thinking about the outcome you get stuck. Easier said than done, I know, but so true....
5 October 2014 at 14:30
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